Parshat Miketz: Your Secret Identity
It is a dance we do in silence
Far below this morning sun
You in your life, me in mine
We have begun
-Jackson Browne
This week’s parsha has us in the middle of the lengthy and involved events of Joseph and his brothers. A lot has happened to Brother Joe since the brothers sold him into slavery. A lot to Joseph that is, the brothers – not so much.
Joseph went from most-favoured son to being sold as a slave, then to trusted servant in the house of Egyptian officer, Potiphar, then to prisoner after being framed for rape, and now finds himself as the Viceroy of the powerful nation of Egypt. He certainly has had his ups and downs, to say the least.
As fate (read: God) would have it, at this juncture in his life, Joseph meets his brothers when they come to Egypt to purchase food during the famine in the region. The Torah narrates that when they first meet each other, “Joseph recognized his brothers, but they did not recognize him.”
Why not? How come he knew who they were but they could not tell who he was? There are a number of factors that could have contributed to this. Rashi, citing the Talmud, says that the last time they were together he didn’t have a beard, but now he did.
Hmmm, that explanation on its own seems a little lame. I have the same problem with this as I did when I watched those old Superman TV shows from the 60’s and wondered how Lois Lane or Jimmy Olsen couldn’t recognize that Clark Kent and Superman were one and the same. I mean, really – eyeglasses and a hat don’t change a person’s look that much! So now Joseph had a beard. That’s it? Nah, there has to be more to it than that.
The commentary Chizkuni (13th century France) amplifies this idea and makes it more plausible by adding that in addition to the beard, he had a different name which Pharaoh had given him. “Yossel, Shmerel, Izzy – those names don’t fly here in Egypt. From now on you will be Tzafnat-Panayach.” And there you have it: a different look, a different name plus the fact that Joseph spoke Egyptian could have very well concealed his true identity.
But more than that, the last time the brothers saw Joseph, 22 years ago, he was on his way to a foreign land as a lowly slave. It would never cross their minds that the powerful official and leader whom they now stood before, garbed in royal raiment, would be their little brother. And this is probably the biggest reason they would never assume that His Royal Highness, Tzafnat-Panayach and Yosef were one and the same.
The last memory of their brother was that he was the annoying favoured child of their dad. That, along with the feelings of jealousy and animosity over his tattle-telling habits, his tone-deaf insistence of relating his dreams which smacked of hubris, and his prancing about in his fancy-schmancy Hugo Boss coat that his father gave him.
What they never witnessed was their brother as a mature, super-successful grown-up in a role and in a place and position that he excelled at. They never saw him doing the things he is great at doing: Winning the confidence of everyone he meets with his honesty, sincerity and integrity (and yes, drop-dead good looks which always helps). As he did with his master, Potiphar to the point where he is taking charge of running his stately home and affairs. Or, after he is framed and thrown into jail, running the prison where the warden has him in charge of all the other inmates. And finally, saving a nation with his perceptive insight into the soul and dreams of its leader, Pharaoh and confidently advising him what he must do to keep his nation from economic ruin.
And this is the real reason why they couldn’t recognize Joseph. Because they never saw, nor could they have ever imagined, Joseph in any of these roles. To them he was always the bratty, little snot they despised. It is not too dissimilar to when a parent sees their child for the first time in their professional career. This person in scrubs, confidently treating patients – this is the little pisher we raised? The child who becomes a lawyer, or therapist, or mother of four children of her own, or runs a business – is almost unrecognizable to the parent who has, up until that point, pigeon-holed their child and has always seen him or her in a very limited way.
Yeah Joseph now had a beard and his outer appearance changed dramatically over those many years. But it was more than his appearance that changed. Twenty two years ago he was a boy. A boy with dreams of grandeur and with lots of potential, but still a boy. But now he was a man with a mission and with innumerable accomplishments under his belt. But in their minds eye he was always that little kid back in Canaan, and so of course the brothers didn’t recognize him. They never could have dreamed that he would indeed become that great leader he foretold them about so long ago. Joseph could dream about it and see it, but the brothers couldn’t, even when it was right there staring them in the face.
To Joseph’s credit, he never allowed their restrictive and limiting assumption of who and what he could become squash his dreams and visions. He never allowed their short-sighted view blind him to his visions and dreams of himself. And neither must we. We must never let another’s view of us define us and limit what we know we can become. Even, and especially, if it comes from those closest to us like family members.
Others might not see the red and yellow insignia on your chest, but you know it’s there. So go up, up and away and fly and meet those dreams you know are true about yourself.
But it’s a long way that I have come
Across the sand to find you here among these people in the sun…
Oh it’s so far the other way my life has gone
